Friday 29 September 2017

Infertility and Me: Part Five

Click to read part 1,2,3 and 4.

It has been so cathartic to get our story out there over this past week. After such a long time trying to muddle through and keep some form of normal life happening, it is definitely good to just lay it all on a plate and put it out there. I wanted to say a huge thank you for all the comments and messages I have been sent. By letting me share the story so far and open up this conversation about fertility, miscarriage and everything that goes with it, you have really given me a bit of myself back which is something I didn't expect to gain. I didn’t want my posts to seem like a big woe is me self-indulgent ramble, but instead serve as a bit of behind the scenes of the complexity and highs and lows that infertility can bring and I hope I have achieved that. Honestly the bravery I have seen from others sharing their stories with me has been so inspiring, and alongside all the wonderful messages of support, it really has made this whole blog series feel worthwhile, so thank you.

 It is not over yet for us and we still have a way to go but I will be updating on the journey soon. I thought to end the week I would just finish these posts up with some links to infertility and miscarriage support pages for anyone else who find themselves landing on these pages looking for information and are not sure where to turn. All of this can be such a devastatingly lonely time, so I want you to know you are not alone.

Fertility Network UK

Tommys Miscarriage charity

And I had to pop up a little glossary for anyone undertaking this journey; the internet is a total friend and foe in this situation. I kept my distance quite a bit from it, aside from some lovely TTC pals on Instagram, but there are loads of words it would be easier to know what they mean when reading the many forums.

TTC- trying to conceive
PCOS- Polycystic ovary syndrome
2 WW - two week wait
AF- Aunt Flo- Period
AI - Artificial Insemination
ART - Assisted Reproductive Technology
BBT - Basal Body Temperature
BBs – yer boobs!
BD - Baby Dance (intercourse)
BFN - Big Fat Negative (Neg Pregnancy Test)
BFP - Big Fat Positive! (Positive Pregnancy Test
CD - Cycle Day
CF - Cervical Fluid
CM - Cervical Mucus
ENDO – Endometriosis
ET - Embryo Transfer
EPT - Early Pregnancy Test
FET - Frozen Embryo Transfer
HPT - Home Pregnancy Test
ICI - Intra-cervical Insemination
ICSI - Intra-cytoplasmic Sperm Injection
IVF - InVitro Fertilization
LP - Luteal Phase
LSP - Low Sperm Count
MC,m/c – Miscarriage
MF – MaleFactor ( sperm issues)
O - Ovulation, Ovulated
OPK - Ovulation Predictor Kit
OPT - Ovulation Predictor Test
PG – Pregnant
POAS - Pee on a stick (Home Pregnancy Test)
SA - Semen Analysis
TWW - Two week wait (also 2WW)
WTF- the apt you have after any treatment is not working or all goes wrong!

That might read like nothing to anyone but I can now fully type and speak in this shorthand, What a strange thing to carry with me following all these treatments!

I truly hope that something in my week of posts is a help to someone out there. I look back at my story so far and just feel sorry for me and Ally in some ways, I hate the idea of anyone else sitting with that pretty unavoidable struggle and feeling of loneliness.

Actually Ally is probably an ideal person to end the week on, without him (and Mairead who will just never have the choice to put with me or not , and the best manager in the world Dulcie) I honestly am not sure quite sure where I would be. The amount of support both emotional and physical at points he has provided has been phenomenal. We always talk about how I shouldn’t have to thank him for just doing what he believes a partner’s job is, but I do thank him. He goes above and beyond and at times as had to deal with elements of me that neither of us really knew existed. If there is one thing I can take away from it all, it is that we are pretty sure we can get through most things after this.

Thanks for reading this week, I really value your support.

I will be making a last push to get these stories out there today, to help reach the people who might need it or they may know someone who does. I would love it if you could tweet or post a link to the blog or one of the posts somewhere and help break that silence and allow other stories to be heard.

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